Cutting Through the Smoke - A Parent's Guide to Talking to Your Kids About Tobacco

Parents everywhere want to see their children grow up happy and healthy. And one of the best ways to ensure your children’s health is to make sure they never start smoking. Tobacco eventually kills half of the people who get hooked on it. This year, tobacco will kill about 2,000 Manitobans. The vast majority of smokers and other tobacco users start in their teens. The good news is that the kids who make it to adulthood without using tobacco will probably stay tobacco-free for life.

As a parent, you can make the difference.

You have a tremendous influence on the way your child sees the world. According to one study, children whose parents talked with them about tobacco were a lot less likely to ever smoke. The study showed that this is also true for children of parents who smoke. In fact, when parents who smoke talked to their children, the child’s chances of staying tobacco-free doubled.

This guide will help you have that conversation with your child – and help you both make the most of your talk.

Think about what you want to talk about. You don't have to swamp your child with facts and figures. But you will want to decide which points will have the greatest impact. Look through this guide, and think about how the facts and ideas can relate to your child's situation. Set aside some time for you and your child to sit down together without being disturbed. It can be something informal – while you’re driving to hockey or music practice, for instance, or after a TV show, or just before bedtime. And remember, this won’t be the only talk you have on the subject. You don’t have to cover everything in one discussion. Whenever you have some time alone together, you can strike up the conversation again.

There are plenty of openings for a talk about tobacco. Here are just a few of the conversation-starters that have worked for parents:

After visiting a friend or relative

"Did you know that Aunt Evelyn quit smoking last month? She’s been trying for years, but I think she’ll finally make it this time."

After watching a movie 

"You remember that scene where the hero lights up a cigarette? Did you know tobacco companies often pay actors to do that?"

After talking about sports

"She’s a great athlete, isn’t she? But it would be a lot harder for her to do as well if she smoked."

After hearing about someone with cancer, heart disease or some other tobacco-related illness

"Did you know that smoking is what caused (name)’s illness? He started smoking when he was 15 and was addicted for life." 

Find a way to begin and the conversation will take on a life of its own.

Early in the conversation, ask what your child thinks of tobacco. Listen carefully to the answer, and talk about your child ’s beliefs and feelings. Share a few facts. Talk about the effects tobacco use could have on your child’s:HEALTH
It ’s more immediate than just the long-term consequences like heart disease and cancer. Teens who smoke get more colds, more sore throats, a constant cough and a greater risk of diseases like asthma.

FITNESS
Kids who smoke have less energy, less endurance and poorer athletic performance.

APPEARANCE
Your hair, breath and clothes all end up stinking. And smokers can look forward to ugly stains on their fingernails and teeth.

WALLET
Work through the cost of smoking with your child, based on a pack of cigarettes a day …for a week, a month or a year. Where else could that money go, instead of up in smoke?

FREEDOM
Tobacco can be as hard to quit as heroin. A few years ago, a survey of high school students found that only 5%of smokers thought they’d still be smoking two years after they graduated. Eight years later, 75% of them were still smoking.

If your child thinks that nearly everyone smokes, you can point out that 28% of Manitobans aged 15 to 19 smoke. That’s only about one in four – even if it is still way too many. You can also talk about the ingredients in cigarette smoke. Bring out some household items like window cleaner, nail polish remover, lighter fluid and turpentine. Each one has ingredients in common with tobacco smoke.

It’s only a matter of time before someone offers your son or daughter a cigarette. You can help your child practise saying no without feeling stupid. No one response works for every child. Try to work out an answer that makes the most sense for your child.

Here’s what some kids like to say:

• "I’d rather save my money for the latest video games."
• "Why would I want to smell like an ashtray?"
• "If you aren’t cool already, a cigarette won’t help."
• "There’s been enough cancer in my family."
• "I won’t be able to make the team if I’m slowed down by smoking."

And something that works a lot better than you might expect:

• "No, thanks."

Let your child know clearly that you don’t want them to start using tobacco — or even to try it. But also make sure your child understands that you’re always there to listen and talk things over. If one of their friends has offered them a cigarette, or if they’re feeling a lot of pressure, you want to know about it — because you care.

The pressure to smoke will only increase as your child gets older. You’ll want to have this conversation with your daughter or son many times - to reinforce your message and listen to how your child is coping.

Did you know …If you can help your child stay tobacco-free until their 16th birthday, they’ll probably stay that way for life! Every conversation you have about tobacco helps your child stay healthy and tobacco-free. It tells your child that you care. And it keeps the lines of communication open, letting your child tell you about other issues in their lives.

Why not start the conversation tonight?

For more information about Tobacco Control: